Patience is a virtue...most of the time

I am very much the type of person who is laid back and doesn't let things get to me.  I'm pretty go-with-the-flow and I've found that being that way causes a lot less tension and stress in life compared to people who are uptight and dramatic.  Of course sometimes you just can't help the way you feel about certain things.  Even with my laid back-ness, I tend to get insanely annoyed with myself when things do end up getting to me, but I'm guessing I'm not the only person who does that.

Patience might as well be my middle name.  I am a very patient person and probably more so than I should be.  I've heard people say that being patient and not pushing for what you want will get you nowhere, but I disagree.  There's a lot of honor and trust involved in letting things happen on their own.  It's not always the easy way to handle situations but that doesn't mean it's the wrong way.  Though there are those times when you become weak and your patience wears thin and afterwards you want to punch yourself in the face out of frustration for being an idiot.

Obviously this mentality does not apply to all situations.  There are times when you need to absolutely get yourself out of something and not wait to see what happens or to see if things will get better or if people will change.  Everyone has situations like that in life, but it's knowing when to be patient and when to get out that makes all the difference.

I love myself, as everyone should love themselves.  I love my personality, my sense of humor, my eyes and my butt.  But there are times when I hate myself.  A few of those times being when, in high school, I made out with a guy who had a girlfriend (which I was aware of) and let him get to second base, or when I talk endlessly about my feelings with my boyfriend and feel like I sound annoying and needy, or when I lied to my parents all last year about who I was with and where I was going, or even when I eat so many Skittles that I feel like puking.  The key to limiting those moments of self-hatred is to surround yourself with people who make you love yourself, people who bring out the best in you and don't judge you when you slip up.  Even though I'm only 21, I have been through enough to know which people are good for me and which people are bad for me.  I used to be friends with a few people who were jerks and made me feel stupid and put me down a lot just for being me.  I've been friends with people who made me uptight and caused a lot of unnecessary drama.  That's not who I am and those people are no longer in my life more than they need to be. I am a patient and laid back person but I definitely won't tolerate people who try to change me or put me down or anyone who tries to do the same to the people I love.

Nursing Woes

College is, in a way, the beginning of your life. Your "grown up" life away from your parents, where you're free to do what you want and study what you want.  Four years are dedicated to figuring out your future and preparing for a career in the real world.  Not to mention you have the pleasure of racking up immense amounts of student loans that you'll be paying off till you're 80. Oh goody.

For me, college has been a mild form of torture.  Now, I'm not going to sit here and complain about studying and not being able to party as much as I want and stupid things like that.  You have to work hard to make it through and you have to learn to balance your social life and your academics, those are rules 1 and 2.  The reason that I dislike school a bit more than most is because of my major.  I'm going to let you in on a little secret...nursing school completely sucks.  That is a fact agreed on by every nursing student that I know.  It also doesn't help that I really don't want to be a nurse.  That's not to say it's something I'm bad at, I've been holding my own throughout the years of schooling.  But it's a lot easier to get through school when you enjoy what you're learning.  Sometimes in my lecture halls I will look around the room and find those people (the majority of the class) who are attentively listening and hanging on the professor's every word.  They're truly interested in learning about beta blockers or end-stage renal disease or whatever we're learning that day.  All I can say is that I wish I was one of those people.  I'd give anything to be passionate about nursing and to have a huge desire to help people and take care of people during the worst times of their lives.  Unfortunately, I'm more the I-only-chose-this-career-because-I'm-likely-to-find-a-job-when-I-graduate type person.  That type of person is not uncommon, especially since money makes the world go round and you only get money if you can find a decent job.  But I never realized how difficult it actually is to be one of those people.

With that said, I have discovered that I thoroughly enjoy sticking people with needles and I find diseases and their effects very interesting.  Passing out medications to the patients is interesting, especially when they're not just oral meds.  Creams, patches, nebulizers, inhalers, injections, IV treatments, those are all more fun than just giving pills (most of the time).  I haven't gotten to actually start an IV yet but I imagine that's pretty fun too, as long as you do it right.  I am hoping to get to work with other populations besides the elderly in my clinical setting (they're all I've worked with so far).  Also I've managed to make it through 35 hours of clinicals without having to wipe anyone's ass (thank god), but that's bound to come up.

Even with just one year left, I still have a lot to learn and a lot of clinical experience to gain.  Who knows, maybe I'll end up falling in love with nursing and being super excited to graduate and get a job.  Maybe...

Blog Virgin

I've always thought it would be awesome to be one of those people who had an interesting, yet slightly humorous, blog where they recounted stories, posted opinions, and shared whatever popped into their witty little heads.  Think Ashley Rickards on MTV's Awkward, but without all the drama.  Well I make no promises of wit, but I figured I'd give this a try.

I suppose, this being my first post, I should give some background information about myself.  If you don't care, then don't read it.  I'm a 21-year-old nursing major at a college in the lovely state of Wisconsin.  Joking, I don't find anything about Wisconsin lovely. It's cold and there's Packers fans and stores stop selling liquor at 9pm. Seriously, who does that?  Movies, music and books are very important to me and I'm hoping to someday have a room in my house dedicated solely to those three things.  Sarcasm is a language that I speak fluently.  I've never had a cavity.  Spiders terrify me, though so do all bugs. If I ever ask you "Cubs or Sox?" and your answer is "I'm a Chicago fan," I reserve the right to kick you out of Illinois.  We pick sides here. I have an unhealthy obsession with buying bras and candles, I really dislike manipulative people, and I will defend the deliciousness of Taco Bell till the day I die.

When trying to think of what to post on here, my boyfriend suggested it should be "Julianne's meaning of life."  He was also pushing for a porn blog, but that's beside the point.  It's definitely going to take more than one post to figure out just what the meaning of life is from my perspective, but until then, enjoy the random ramblings.